Two years ago today this photo was taken in Bali the day I decided to initially give up alcohol for a year to see how my life would change. What I could achieve in a year without alcohol.
I had just visited a spiritual healer and he changed the course of my life in the space of a couple of hours. I knew when I sat eating this meal my life wouldn’t be the same again. Something inside me changed, something finally fitted into place. I knew I was exactly where I was supposed to be in that exact moment. A rebirth. An awakening whatever you want to call it. For me it felt like a homecoming and a shedding of a dark shadow I had carried around for too long.
I like everyone else had drunk on and off since I started experimenting with alcohol in my early teens. I didn’t even like the stuff when I first started drinking but as you keep going to keep up with your friends the poison takes hold slowly. Before I knew it I was a party girl drinking most weekends.
Then the bottles of wine at home were the next stage having a few glasses to relax after a stressful day at work. Sometimes I took it to the extreme when feeling lost I would drink until I fell asleep or even blacked out.
Alcohol takes so much away from you. I’ve seen so many successful beautiful people loose everything marriages, jobs, homes, freedom, the list is endless. Alcohol is one of the biggest causes of accidents and deaths in the Uk.
For me thou the saddest thing I see with alcohol is stripping away peoples natural confident aura bit by bit. People think it gives them that extra sparkle but that’s the poison of the drug. It makes you believe something that isn’t real. While is takes away your own natural magic.
Alcohol is such a trap that you can’t see when your in it. It’s only after you come out the other side, that you realise so much.
It’s changed so much about me. I finally feel like my authentic self. I’m more confident, less anxiety, a completely different mindset. My physical health and emotional health is a million times better. My body image also as I make better choices with no more binge eating on the days I felt hungover.
This post isn’t about all the positive changes that giving up alcohol can do for you, as I written about this before. Although if you want to change your life, mindset and health I recommend give up alcohol and I can guarantee those changes your always secretly trying to achieve will happen for you.
This post is about how proud I am of this girl. She could quite of easily given up. So many people questioned my why? But she had the discipline, determination and will power to keep going as she knew there was more on the other side. It’s wasn’t an easy feat either. So much comes up that needs healing when you stop drinking. I used alcohol to self sooth, to manage my emotions, to manage my stress levels, to celebrate. I used alcohol as a way of trying to get through life unscathed the irony as alcohol was the problem not the other things. Its a cycle of repeat, repeat, repeat and until you get off fully you can’t see the damage it does. As you don’t know what it feels like to be alcohol free.
It takes 6 to 8 months for the alcohol to come out of your system and that’s when your subconscious starts to release old trauma and wounds you have buried down so deep.
Flash backs happen has your brain starts functioning without being in a lower vibrational state and your awareness and consciousness start to explode. You start to recalibrate.
You have to learn to get to know yourself again on a whole new different level of thinking and your life changes because people and things that suited you before just won’t sit right with you anymore. As you respect yourself more, you have stronger boundaries and your world opens up to positive vibration.
While your drinking alcohol it doesn’t matter how much your only holding yourself back from being your true self.
Two years sober for me feels like fresh headed every day. No more hungover feelings or thoughts of why did I do that or why did I say this? No more running away from my emotions. I’ve learnt to sit with them and know they will pass. No more running away from things I know face things head on with confidence. I hold myself 100 percent accountable for me life and don’t blame others for my mistakes.
The Treatment Room 